Composure: Losin’ It
By Misty Dietz
Let’s talk about emotional self-control, or more to the point…the lack of it. I’ve always been interested in the circumstances in which someone isn’t able to keep their emotions in check. It says a lot about that person—what’s important to her, what his fears are, and where her Achilles heel is.
When I’m crafting my characters, this is always one of the first things I think about. In my debut COME HELL OR HIGH DESIRE my heroine rushes into an intense murder scene, and she completely loses her composure. For me it was an extremely emotional scene to write—one in which I drew upon a recent loss of composure of my own.
When I attended my local Citizen’s Police Academy, one of the weeks’ topics was on sex crimes and domestic violence. What I wasn’t prepared for was the detective’s segment on sex crimes against children. The stories were horrifying. I couldn’t stop crying during that entire hour-long presentation. I wasn’t audible, but I leaked tears like a pin-pricked waterbed.
I was never so glad I had long hair so I could at least hide a little behind it. Finally the detective said we should all take a break, so I high-tailed it to the restroom to get myself together. One of the Academy coordinators came to find me because she saw how upset I was. She gave me a hug and told me she takes it just as hard…but since she’s an officer, she has to wait to let it out until she’s done dealing with these kind of monsters.
Thank God for law enforcement.
So yeah, losin’ it isn’t always easy, but it can create opportunities to forge intimacy and trust. And that’s a great tool in a writer’s toolbox!
What about you guys? When was the last time YOU lost your composure?
At the end of my blog tour we’ll be drawing the name of two commenters from all of the blogs to gift not one, but two fantastic prize winners. See below for details, and thanks for being here! xo, misty ;)
About Misty Dietz
About Come Hell or High Desire
Torn between dangerous desires…
Framed for a series of brutal murders, rebel-turned-CEO Zack Goldman must go to ground. When he discovers that sexy boutique owner Sloane Swift has a shocking gift—terrifying visions that connect her to his mentor’s missing daughter—he can’t believe her refusal to help him. Nor can he believe he’s actually falling for the frustrating woman.
Their chemistry will either find its perfect equation…
Helping an accused killer ranks low on Sloane’s to-do list, no matter how hot the attraction burns between them. But putting to rest her overwhelming guilt over the missing girl’s fate proves more difficult than she ever imagined…that is, until her heart and conscience begin to align.
…or detonate everything in its path.
As the real killer locks in on Sloane, Zack will stop at nothing to keep her safe. And as they earn each other’s trust—with danger in hot pursuit—they may just lose their hearts in the process…
Her fingernails suddenly raked at her skull. “Lord! I almost forgot. We have to go back to Ann’s. She has a diary!”
He swerved into an empty parking lot and swiveled to face her, blood pounding in his ears. “What are you talking about?”
“Ann keeps a diary. We have to find it.”
“You’re just telling me this now? You should have goddamn said something right away!”
“Don’t you dare curse at me like that, you seismic jackass!”
He had to get out. He flung the truck door open and strode onto the cracked asphalt. Her door slammed shut moments later, and within seconds she was wagging a finger in his face. “And don’t you walk away from me, either!”
“Then don’t be such a damn shrew.”
Color flooded over her cheekbones seconds before she punched him in the gut. Hard. An ancient fire lit up his nerve circuits and adrenaline had him widening his stance. His heart gunned.
His groin tightened.
And she was still shrill.
“I’m not a shrew! How am I supposed to act in a situation like this? You think I’m enjoying this? I hate it! But unfortunately I have a conscience which would haunt me for the rest of my life if I don’t follow this through until we have some answers. You came to me and wanted to rule out the church first. Then with everything that happened, I forgot about the diary until right now. That clear enough for you, you—”
Clear enough, honey.
He vised her head between his palms and kissed her. He hadn’t meant to, but the moment her mouth opened to his, he was lost. Not breaking contact with her mouth, he wrapped one arm around her, his hand splaying across her ass, locking her hips against him. Her hands were in his hair, her hips grinding, driving him crazy. They feasted on each other’s mouth, tongues dueling, daring, seeking. He felt her fingers between their bodies, slipping underneath the waistband of his jeans, pulling at the hem of his shirt. Her fingernail scraped his abs and he groaned. She leaned away from his mouth, her eyes dead sexy. Liquid brown. He was gonna
A car horn blew, jerking him back to life. Back to the parking lot. He looked over to see a man in a black minivan at a stoplight giving them the thumbs up. He honked twice more, waved, and drove on.
Sloane burst into a fit of laughter that quickly dissolved into tears.
And that clinched it. He’d woken up this morning in some creepy-assed Twilight Zone.
Buy Come Hell or High Desire